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worlds undone

worlds undone

Category Archives: Dolores

CCXLVIII – family freedom

25 Thursday Dec 2008

Posted by nelle in Addison, Anita, Dolores, Dottie Salston, Jahrae, llhaesa, Serada

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blog fiction, blog novels, blog stories, blog-books, creative writing, e books, e novels, eBooks, feminism, feminist, feminist fiction, feminist literature, feminist stories, feminist writing, fiction, lesbian, lesbian books, lesbian fiction, lesbian literature, lesbian stories, lesbian writing, lesbian-novels, literature, online books, online novels, original fiction, story telling, writing

In an undisclosed location outside of Washington, Ronnie, Addison, Serada, and Anita lived under guard, guards who served dual purpose: keeping others away, and keeping the family from leaving.

Dolores O’Brien was not required to remain, but chose to stay with the family anyway, helping them through this trying time. All tired of the confinement and restrictions, and there was an edginess to their manner.

The girls were due in school now, and instead the government hired tutors to see to their education on premises, much to the dismay of the girls, who missed their classmates.

The government allowed the Salstons to make outside calls and use the internet, and so they managed to stay in contact with friends and catch up on things. Initially some friends backed away, unsure of what to make of the Salston children, but since llhaesa’s interview with Jamila, friends who ignored contact before now actively sought out the Salstons.

The adults were on edge due to the lack of things to keep them occupied, for staff handled most daily chores. Ronnie sensed things changing after the interview, for the staffers were friendlier, and the children’s friends were now soliciting contact with Addison and Serada.

All missed llhaesa, and no one they interacted with were willing to share any information on llhaesa’s current condition, leading Ronnie to fear her friend and parent of her children was once again receiving ill treatment.

As Ronnie actively thought of llhaesa, the secure phone in their living room rang. Anita moved to answer, and as Ronnie looked on inquisitively, Anita held out the phone toward Ronnie, simply saying, “The call is for you.”

Ronnie closed the distance between them, thinking she saw a smile play across her mom’s lips, and before she could give this more thought, she grabbed the phone to answer.

“Llhaesa! It is so nice to hear your voice; I cannot begin to convey how worried I have been. How are you?”

Llhaesa explained how they gave her permission to call, that everything was ok, that so far they treated her well. “They keep asking me to give them useful information, and when I do not, they back away. I keep wondering why they hold me, and wonder if they will change their mind on tactics, but so far, I am living in comfortable space, have television, a keyboard, and some reading material.

To be honest, Ronnie, I am distressed you are still in confinement. You have done nothing, nor have the girls. Moreover, none of you can give them anything. They should let you go!”

Ronnie sighed, knowing what they faced was nothing compared to llhaesa, but still the children did not deserve this fate. “Llhaesa, they have talked to us a few times, asking if you shared anything we might remember. We have all told them we did not discuss any such details, only history and relationships and those types of things.”

Llhaesa laughed at this notion, adding “It seems silly for them to think I would sit down and talk about microbiology with my family. Is that the sort of thing their families discuss?” llhaesa asked rhetorically.

“Ronnie, I told you before Jahrae is likely on her way. For weeks now, I have not felt anything more, until yesterday. She is… near.”

“Near? How near?”

“This is all speculative, but I have faith in my intuition. Near as in to be in orbit above our heads in the next week.”

Ronnie gasped. “That is wonderful news to hear! If this is accurate, what do you expect to happen?”

“She will locate me, and then seek my release.”

“What if the government refuses?”

“There will be no violence if this is your worry. Jahrae would not act with violent intent. Diplomats who will work to secure my release undoubtedly accompany her. Jahrae will let the diplomats do their jobs, though I wonder.”

“Will you leave, then?” Ronnie had worried a good deal over this potential possibility, and dreaded this outcome.

“It is not my intent to leave, my children are here. I will return to Arrhazon at some point, but my goal is to live on both worlds, shuttling back and forth. There are things I wish to work on here.”

“What if our government refuses to let you stay?”

“Then I will live elsewhere.”

“We will go with you, we will live where you live. We are family.”

“Yes, I am heartened to hear you reaffirm this, Ronnie. We are family.”

“Llhaesa, how do you think Jahrae will react to my presence?”

“She will come to love you as I do, Ronnie. Of that, I have zero doubt. It is rather amusing to contemplate how our children will have three parents, and four sets of grandparents – your mum, my mum, Jahrae’s mum and dad, and Dottie Salston.”

“Dottie! I wonder how she is llhaesa.”

“I spoke with her, and she understands better now, though it hit her hard initially.”

“The children are not truly descended from her, llhaesa.”

“I know, but family goes beyond biology. She was their grandparent through their young lives, and in my opinion, she remains another mum to me and grandmother to our children.”

Ronnie accepted this explanation, and agreed with the sentiment. She had another question to ask, but she also had something to share with llhaesa, something that might disappoint Dottie.

“Llhaesa, Addison wishes to change her surname.”

Llhaesa was quiet for a moment before asking, “How does she wish to change her name?”

“She is not yet certain, but she wishes to have her name reflect her heritage, and one of the things she has mentioned is Addison Salston Lorrie-T’yaeli. I will not let her use lower case spelling, at least for now! She has also kicked around T’yaeli-Salston and who knows what else.”

“What is your thinking on this, Ronnie?

“Honestly? I might do the same thing.” At this, Ronnie laughed, knowing her and llhaesa would no longer be married. “Seriously, I might change my name to Lorrie-Salston.”

Llhaesa was amused, though she well understood the ways of naming on this world. “Let’s see. I can be llhaesa ahrella t’yaeli-khentavra-salston-lorrie.”

Ronnie giggled, picturing that name on a driver’s license. “You do get around, llhaesa.”

“Yeah, leave my mark across 50 light years. Not bad at all!”

Llhaesa, can you hold for a moment? Someone wishes to enter.”

“Sure Ronnie, I will hold.”

Ronnie put the receiver down and headed for the entry, opening the door to find their liaison. “Ms Salston, as of this moment, you and your family are released, though we will continue to provide protection. You may return to your home.”

“Are you serious?”

“Yes, ma’am.” Ronnie called out a loud ‘woot!’ which llhaesa clearly heard over the phone line. Ronnie scurried back to the phone and shared the good news with llhaesa.

“Ronnie, that is excellent!” Llhaesa offered, a surge of relief passing through her body. “Are you going to head for home?”

“You bet llhaesa. I cannot wait to be in our home again, free from government encroachment. They insist they will provide security for us though, so it remains to be seen exactly how free we are.”

“Take this as a gracious blessing of the universe, Ronnie. Little steps can make one big step. I will go, but here is the number to call…”

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♣ raison d’être


Over the past seven months, writing the individual stories of llhaesa and Jahrae, as well as their common story, has taken a special place in my heart.

There are some elements, those with playful exchanges, or those where discussion is heavier, that grab hold of my emotions, sometimes even grab hold of my thoughts, weighing upon me during the day.

llhaesa’s story has been welling inside of me for some significant time in rough form. The story is a by-product of coping with gender dysphoria, of being a feminist and a lesbian, and dealing with all the issues related to being lgbt through my life, from closet to post-coming out; while finding – or perhaps stumbling - my way through.

Music is the catalyst, a translator of raw sensory information and feelings, that helps me take the cloud forming in my mind and shape it into story. Sometimes this is via the lyrics, other times through the melody, sometimes simply by way of the sound of an individual instrument.

Musical influences come from Delerium; Beth Orton; Dar Williams; Joan Armatrading; Sarah McLachlan; Tori Amos; Natalie Merchant; Heather Nova; Tracy Chapman; Linda Perry; Alanis Morissette; Bruce Springsteen; Brooke White; Roxy Music; and many others.

There is no order to the posting of story elements or in writing them; each is posted randomly in time, of character, of place - much like how we might share stories from our lives with another. There are times when I will string together elements, and that pattern is evident in the rescue of llhaesa and the subsequent reunion.

Most of the novel is told via a narrator; with one exception. Writing llhaesa’s last day from her perspective - what she experiences, what she sees unfold around her, how she views and reacts to these things – seemed more compelling and interesting. I added one final element to this that actually is not of her last day on Arrhazon, but in her coming out here.

There are six posts told from llhaesa’s real time experience. These story elements (in her words I-VI) are the most interesting and fun to write, as well as the most emotionally draining. As I write this, 29 posts remain in book one, and the last ten have proven the most demanding emotionally.

Some of the story involves an element of science fiction, necessary to bridge the connection between the two worlds, the disconnects, the reconnects. It is not my intent to fashion a tale of science fiction, and the parts that touch on it will remain an essential minimum. The true intent is to share a humanist and feminist story, one where two worlds struggle to find their way to gender equality. The main protagonists are lesbian, and we get to see where at least on one world, this is no issue. Our world can have issue with us, and in this story, one gets to watch as both worlds find their way to creating more accepting and equal societies. The next book will find llhaesa facing this issue square on.

The story consists of 300 individual elements, which when collectively read forms a story of book length. As written currently and displayed on the blog, this is a rough draft; changes will likely be made over time to already published elements.

This is Book One, as what follows post 300 will best be framed into its own book. The second will address issues that will be at once interesting and challenging to explore and contemplate - building upon the story told in Book One. Llhaesa, drawing upon idealism, optimism, and an incredible ability to motivate, will tackle issues in ways I believe most all of us in the lesbian community would wish to see unfold in actuality. If nothing else, the story allows us to get lost in fantasy for a while.

While the title is ‘world’s undone,' this is really the life story of and the results triggered by an incredibly talented musician and activist. Llhaesa refuses to sit idly by while gender discrimination harms the women of her world and freedom is lost on one world, paying a terrible price for her effort. When she resurfaces here, now it is our turn to face her challenges to a world resulting from her unrelenting vision and dreams.

Jahrae, while prominent throughout the story, is sort of the unsung hero, the person who grows through the story to become a formidable presence in her own right. This is by design, and her growth is a perfect match to llhaesa, who needs someone to challenge and inspire her to new learning, to new creativity.

As I wrote the story, note that I originally did not plan on having the children parented by Jahrae, Ronnie, and llhaesa. Initially my intent was for friction to build, to show that sometimes we run into difficulty seeing eye to eye with our spouses. In the end, I could not do this, for my idealism and optimism, of trying to craft something as it should be, got in the way.

nelle

♣ say that again?

Aalon:

A.ah.lawn



Aailhra:

A.yul.har.rah



Arrhazon:

Are.ha zawn



Brellian:

Brr.L.lee.an



Chsensera:

Cheh.sen.sear.rah



Cshrehyi:

Sess.ray.hee



Djellrin:

Dee.jell.er.in



E'sphara:

E.ss.far.ruh



Gl’nsiel Frehsan:

Jellen.sheel Fray.shawn



Hrilleae:

Ha.rill.ee.ay



I'Isahra M'lensa:

I.ih.sah.rah Mah.len.sah



Jahrae T'srha Khentavra:

Ja.ha.ray Teh.share.ahh Ka.hen.tahv.rah



Jesnsera Sserhara:

Ja.ess.en.sear.ah Say.sear.ahh



Elsrensia K’avahra:

L.sir.rent.sha Kah.hah.vair.ah



Khaehala:

Kay.ha.la



Khahishra:

Ka.ha.heesh.ruh



Kyielra:

Ka.E.I'll.ra



llhaesa ahrella t'yaeli:

lie yay sah are.ha.rell.la tay.lye



Lzrehae N’seseh:

Lah.zer.ra.hay N.sha.say



M'sela J'serhn:

Mah.sell.ahh Jay.sehr.hen



M'traliel Zralensa:

M.tra.lee.ell Zee.ra.len.sah



Mrevan:

Mm.ruh.van



Njesera:

En.djuh.say.rah



N'rellia:

N.rell.lee.ah



Olterian:

Oh.L.tear.E.an



Saehressa:

Sigh.ah.ress.ah



Serada:

Sir.rah.da



Sjre Jlrasre:

S.jer.ray Jas.sell.rass.er



Sk'vra Kjurha:

Skeh.var.rah Kah.jour.rah



Vreloran:

Vreh.lore.an



Zreltian:

Zzer.L.she.an



♣ people and places

  • 51 Pegasi
  • Aailhra
  • Aalon
  • Addison
  • AGA
  • Alicia Ellenwood
  • Anita
  • arlkhala
  • Arrhazon
  • Arrhazon College
  • Arrhka
  • Arrkarhara
  • Barbara Millwood
  • Bill Green
  • Boston
  • Brellian
  • Casey
  • Chsensera
  • city north
  • Cshrehyi
  • David
  • Djellrin
  • Dolores
  • Dottie Salston
  • Dr Elsrensia K’avahra
  • Dr. Ed Ellsworth
  • Dr. Wrehsx
  • E'sphara
  • Empo
  • Ensign Sserhara
  • Gl'nsiel
  • Henry Smithson
  • Hrilleae
  • I’Isahra M’lensa
  • J'saera
  • Jahrae
  • Jamila Karenga
  • J’luhre Forest Preserve
  • Jesnsera
  • Jredvarha City
  • Keene
  • Khaehala
  • Khahishra
  • Kukaeshra
  • Kyielra
  • Lajxa R’chr
  • llhaesa
  • Lzrehae
  • M'sela J'serhn
  • M'traliel
  • Marcia Paang
  • Mark Cahill
  • Mrevan
  • N'rellia
  • N'rellia Naturally
  • Nenseru Woods
  • Njesera
  • North 41
  • Old City
  • Olterian
  • reiki
  • Ronnie
  • Saehressa
  • Sara Beth
  • SEQ
  • Serada
  • Sjre Jlrasre
  • Sk'vra
  • southeast quadrant
  • Susan Woodward
  • Sylvia Washington
  • Tim
  • V'aesza
  • Vicki
  • Vreloran
  • Y'sre School of Music
  • Zreltian

♣ who’s who

Aalon:

Chief Curator of N’rellia Conservatory of Music



Aailhra:

Arrhazonan equivalent to Reiki



Addison:

Ronnie and llhaesa’s eldest daughter



Arrhazon:

llhaesa & Jahrae home world



Brellian:

Unstable Arrhazonan dictator



Chsensera:

Child friend of llhaesa and Jahrae



Cshrehyi T’yaeli:

llhaesa’s brother



Djellrin Khentavra:

Jahrae’s dad



E'sphara:

Owner of E’sphara Artist Colony



Gl’nsiel Frehsan:

Chief of Government after Brellian



Hrilleae Khentavra:

Jahrae’s mum



Admiral I'Isahra M'lensa:

Commander of Equality



Jahrae T'srha Khentavra:

llhaesa’s wife, and Ambassador



Jesnsera Sserhara:

hero of revolution who saves Jahrae



Ensign Jesnsera Sserhara:

daughter of Jahrae’s friend & wife of Chsensera



Elsrensia K’avahra:

Physician and revolutionary



Khaehala:

Chsensera’s mum



Khahishra:

llhaesa’s college roommate and M’traliel’s wife



Kyielra:

victim of murder, witnessed by young Jahrae



llhaesa ahrella t'yaeli:

musician and leader of two worlds



Lzrehae N’seseh:

Government employee and discoverer of important documents



M'sela J'serhn:

llhaesa’s college advisor



M'traliel Zralensa:

friend of llhaesa, and first lover



Mrevan:

llhaesa’s dad



Njesera:

Head of government records department



N'rellia:

Llhaesa’s college and most prestigious school on Arrhazon



Olterian:

Concert promoter



Saehressa:

llhaesa’s mum



Serada:

Ronnie and llhaesa’s youngest daughter



Sjre Jlrasre:

Café owner



Sk'vra Kjurha:

llhaesa nemesis and future hero of revolution



Vreloran:

government technician who helps llhaesa



Zreltian:

Former Arrhazonan Chief of Government



♣ historical tales

  • February 2009
  • January 2009
  • December 2008
  • November 2008
  • October 2008
  • September 2008
  • August 2008
  • July 2008
  • June 2008

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♣ CC License

Worlds Undone

by llhaesa t'yaeli



Is licensed under a

Creative Commons Attribution-No Derivative Works 3.0 United States License.

Based on a work at http://llhaesa.org/.

♣ CC Licence II

Worlds Undone

by llhaesa



Is licensed under a

Creative Commons Attribution-No Derivative Works 3.0 United States License.

Based on a work at llhaesa.wordpress.com.

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