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worlds undone

worlds undone

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CXL – wandering the woods part I

05 Sunday Oct 2008

Posted by nelle in Arrhazon, Arrhka, Jahrae, J’luhre Forest Preserve, llhaesa

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blog fiction, blog novels, blog stories, blog-books, creative writing, e books, e novels, eBooks, feminism, feminist, feminist fiction, feminist literature, feminist stories, feminist writing, fiction, lesbian, lesbian fiction, lesbian literature, lesbian stories, lesbian writing, lesbian-novels, literature, online books, online novels, original fiction, writing

Where Jahrae loved and grew up with sailing, llhaesa grew up with and loved to hike.

After she met Jahrae, llhaesa lured her new love into hiking, taking Jahrae mostly on day trips around the immediate periphery of the city, but with a couple of weekend trips further out thrown in for good measure.

Jahrae for her part suggested for their next hike a hill strewn world forest preserve area – J’luhre Forest Preserve – about 30 kilometres north of her parent’s home. There were countless trails, but there were also interesting rock outcroppings that rendered it possible for people to divert off-trail without causing ecological harm. Areas where there were very fragile mosses and lichens were well marked. Hikers would avoid these areas, though not all moss areas were off-limits.

The Preserve was the realm of the serious hiker, people who respected the rules for interaction with a world forest preserve. Llhaesa fell into this category, and welcomed the chance to explore along the trails. She knew of this forest, but something else always seemed to get in the way of her getting here.

Jahrae changed that, because it was the first place that came to mind when llhaesa threw out the phrase ‘weekend hike.’

The couple decided this was indeed a good place to spend a weekend, and llhaesa took charge of preparations, giving Jahrae a list of essentials that she needed or should bring. Each put together their own pack and supplies, – other than for food, which Jahrae claimed as her province – with suggestions from llhaesa.

Since Jahrae remained a student and llhaesa was a self-employed musician, they were free to leave for J’luhre at any point they wished, though they agreed Jahrae would first attend her one scheduled class for the day.

Actually, llhaesa insisted Jahrae attend her one scheduled class for the day. Llhaesa took schooling more seriously than the mildly free flowing Jahrae. Well knowing llhaesa’s perfect record of academic achievement at the world’s most prestigious school, Jahrae was not about to put up much resistance to llhaesa’s suggestion. Reluctantly, she set off for class whilst llhaesa immersed herself in practice.

Five hours later, the two set off in their new forest green and black personal transport, a sports model they both fell in love with from the moment they saw the vehicle. Sleek, yet with ample storage room, it proved exciting as well as practical.

When registering the vehicle, llhaesa tried to obtain the registration ‘equality,’ but the government bureaucrats would not allow its usage. She then tried a simpler approach, the ‘=’ sign, and that too was disallowed, and finally accepted a basic registration, assigned at random.

Llhaesa piloted the vehicle, claiming Jahrae had use of it to go class, so it was officially her turn.

Jahrae protested good-naturedly “That was only to run to school and back, now you get to drive for an hour! No fair!” to which llhaesa looked at Jahrae with her patented wide, toothy grin, then stuck out her tongue at Jahrae in the process. Jahrae returned the expression, then angled her head over onto llhaesa’s shoulder with an accompanying “I love you, you brat!”

The drive unfolded uneventfully. Llhaesa pulled into the transport holding and registration area at J’luhre, registered and paid, then moved into her assigned space. Already dressed for the hike and completely packed, the two young women grabbed their packs and slid into the holding frames and straps, then set out for the relatively short first leg of their trip.

Since it was so late in the day in terms of remaining light, their plan was to go in about ten kilometres before stopping for the night.

Initially the land overall was flat, with relatively few of the area’s famous up hills or down hills. This changed around 8 kilometres in, with a gentle but steady upslope, as well as a change to a winding pathway.

They noted the trees along the trail as mixed deciduous initially, but with the upslope came more evergreens. At the 10-kilometre mark, they reached the planned initial stopping point, a field with a mix of rock, sand and grasses that afforded a spectacular view of the setting sun, known to Arrhazonans as Arrhka.

The hikers deployed their tent in a sandy area, not that distant from a 4-metre wide stream, but above its flood plain. They placed their packs inside, tied their food high up on a branch away from the tent to prevent wildlife from getting after the food. With this done, they made their way to an overlook and watched Arrhka sink into the west beyond high-lying clouds, the clouds serving as fodder for the colour change to come. As llhaesa and Jahrae watched, the Arrhazonan sky changed through a spectacular array of hues, from violent to indigo to gold, now mixing with a bit of green, orange, and red. Finally, the sky began to settle into a creeping blackness.

The park permitted fires in marked areas of J’luhre, places identified on maps only. Llhaesa took care to start one within an assemblage of rocks that already existed for the purpose. Jahrae prepared dinner, savoury skewers of various Arrhazonan vegetables hand picked for both taste and nutritional balance, marinated since early morning in a special sauce of Jahrae’s own creation.

As the skewers turned over the moderately small open fire, juices slowly oozed and bubbled out, falling down into a narrow catch-tray designed for this purpose. Every few minutes Jahrae would baste the vegetables with the fallen juices.

Finally, Jahrae pronounced the veggies as done, while llhaesa took that as a cue to enter their tent, re-emerging with a bottle of wine and two unbreakable glasses. The wine was of reasonably rare vintage, and some 15 years of age. It also just happened to be a Sauvignon Blanc, Jahrae’s favourite. Llhaesa had packed in the wine for the occasion of their half-year anniversary, intentionally failing to mention this added item to Jahrae.

Jahrae set the skewers on an oval shaped camping plate, and then accepted the glass proffered by llhaesa. She sniffed the wine, her eyes seemingly lighting up by the glow of the flickering fire, then sipped for taste. “Ooooooh, yum!” she offered in approval. She reached for the bottle, read the label, offered ‘wow!” and then hugged llhaesa.

As they hugged, llhaesa whispered in Jahrae’s ear ‘Happy Six-Month Anniversary!” which caused Jahrae to pull back, her face displaying how she was doing the math in her head. “Happy Anniversary! Ohmygosh, I didn’t even think of this… forgive me?”

Llhaesa laughed, and then teased. “I don’t know, you have to do some serious work to make up for your forgetfulness, J-har. I am going to think on what might be appropriate. Suggestions?”

“I could think of a few, but then you are too old to endure such things without serious time to recover, and we are in the middle of a weekend long hike. Suppose we eat?” Jahrae was hungry, but she still needed to zing llhaesa. Priorities established, she reached for the empty plates she had ready to go, and handed one off to llhaesa. The two jumped up, with Jahrae placing a vegetable-laden skewer on llhaesa’s plate.

With dinner now served, it was llhaesa’s turn to ooh and ah. Jahrae’s preparation was nothing short of mouth-watering delicious, and she ultimately ate far more than usual. It helped that Jahrae prepared far more than usual, knowing they would be famished after the hike in.

After dinner was finished, all cookware cleansed, food and cookware stowed, they settled and nuzzled close by the fire, sharing a blanket that they draped over their shoulders. Llhaesa topped off each of their glasses with the last of the wine, and then softly began to sing.

Even in the middle of a forest clearing, even with her voice held to a very low level, there was no mistaking this was the voice of a professional songstress, a voice that any listener knew carried a huge amount of reserve power behind it. For Jahrae, it was a voice of ultimate love, and there existed no sound more beautiful on all of Arrhazon.

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♣ raison d’être


Over the past seven months, writing the individual stories of llhaesa and Jahrae, as well as their common story, has taken a special place in my heart.

There are some elements, those with playful exchanges, or those where discussion is heavier, that grab hold of my emotions, sometimes even grab hold of my thoughts, weighing upon me during the day.

llhaesa’s story has been welling inside of me for some significant time in rough form. The story is a by-product of coping with gender dysphoria, of being a feminist and a lesbian, and dealing with all the issues related to being lgbt through my life, from closet to post-coming out; while finding – or perhaps stumbling - my way through.

Music is the catalyst, a translator of raw sensory information and feelings, that helps me take the cloud forming in my mind and shape it into story. Sometimes this is via the lyrics, other times through the melody, sometimes simply by way of the sound of an individual instrument.

Musical influences come from Delerium; Beth Orton; Dar Williams; Joan Armatrading; Sarah McLachlan; Tori Amos; Natalie Merchant; Heather Nova; Tracy Chapman; Linda Perry; Alanis Morissette; Bruce Springsteen; Brooke White; Roxy Music; and many others.

There is no order to the posting of story elements or in writing them; each is posted randomly in time, of character, of place - much like how we might share stories from our lives with another. There are times when I will string together elements, and that pattern is evident in the rescue of llhaesa and the subsequent reunion.

Most of the novel is told via a narrator; with one exception. Writing llhaesa’s last day from her perspective - what she experiences, what she sees unfold around her, how she views and reacts to these things – seemed more compelling and interesting. I added one final element to this that actually is not of her last day on Arrhazon, but in her coming out here.

There are six posts told from llhaesa’s real time experience. These story elements (in her words I-VI) are the most interesting and fun to write, as well as the most emotionally draining. As I write this, 29 posts remain in book one, and the last ten have proven the most demanding emotionally.

Some of the story involves an element of science fiction, necessary to bridge the connection between the two worlds, the disconnects, the reconnects. It is not my intent to fashion a tale of science fiction, and the parts that touch on it will remain an essential minimum. The true intent is to share a humanist and feminist story, one where two worlds struggle to find their way to gender equality. The main protagonists are lesbian, and we get to see where at least on one world, this is no issue. Our world can have issue with us, and in this story, one gets to watch as both worlds find their way to creating more accepting and equal societies. The next book will find llhaesa facing this issue square on.

The story consists of 300 individual elements, which when collectively read forms a story of book length. As written currently and displayed on the blog, this is a rough draft; changes will likely be made over time to already published elements.

This is Book One, as what follows post 300 will best be framed into its own book. The second will address issues that will be at once interesting and challenging to explore and contemplate - building upon the story told in Book One. Llhaesa, drawing upon idealism, optimism, and an incredible ability to motivate, will tackle issues in ways I believe most all of us in the lesbian community would wish to see unfold in actuality. If nothing else, the story allows us to get lost in fantasy for a while.

While the title is ‘world’s undone,' this is really the life story of and the results triggered by an incredibly talented musician and activist. Llhaesa refuses to sit idly by while gender discrimination harms the women of her world and freedom is lost on one world, paying a terrible price for her effort. When she resurfaces here, now it is our turn to face her challenges to a world resulting from her unrelenting vision and dreams.

Jahrae, while prominent throughout the story, is sort of the unsung hero, the person who grows through the story to become a formidable presence in her own right. This is by design, and her growth is a perfect match to llhaesa, who needs someone to challenge and inspire her to new learning, to new creativity.

As I wrote the story, note that I originally did not plan on having the children parented by Jahrae, Ronnie, and llhaesa. Initially my intent was for friction to build, to show that sometimes we run into difficulty seeing eye to eye with our spouses. In the end, I could not do this, for my idealism and optimism, of trying to craft something as it should be, got in the way.

nelle

♣ say that again?

Aalon:

A.ah.lawn



Aailhra:

A.yul.har.rah



Arrhazon:

Are.ha zawn



Brellian:

Brr.L.lee.an



Chsensera:

Cheh.sen.sear.rah



Cshrehyi:

Sess.ray.hee



Djellrin:

Dee.jell.er.in



E'sphara:

E.ss.far.ruh



Gl’nsiel Frehsan:

Jellen.sheel Fray.shawn



Hrilleae:

Ha.rill.ee.ay



I'Isahra M'lensa:

I.ih.sah.rah Mah.len.sah



Jahrae T'srha Khentavra:

Ja.ha.ray Teh.share.ahh Ka.hen.tahv.rah



Jesnsera Sserhara:

Ja.ess.en.sear.ah Say.sear.ahh



Elsrensia K’avahra:

L.sir.rent.sha Kah.hah.vair.ah



Khaehala:

Kay.ha.la



Khahishra:

Ka.ha.heesh.ruh



Kyielra:

Ka.E.I'll.ra



llhaesa ahrella t'yaeli:

lie yay sah are.ha.rell.la tay.lye



Lzrehae N’seseh:

Lah.zer.ra.hay N.sha.say



M'sela J'serhn:

Mah.sell.ahh Jay.sehr.hen



M'traliel Zralensa:

M.tra.lee.ell Zee.ra.len.sah



Mrevan:

Mm.ruh.van



Njesera:

En.djuh.say.rah



N'rellia:

N.rell.lee.ah



Olterian:

Oh.L.tear.E.an



Saehressa:

Sigh.ah.ress.ah



Serada:

Sir.rah.da



Sjre Jlrasre:

S.jer.ray Jas.sell.rass.er



Sk'vra Kjurha:

Skeh.var.rah Kah.jour.rah



Vreloran:

Vreh.lore.an



Zreltian:

Zzer.L.she.an



♣ people and places

  • 51 Pegasi
  • Aailhra
  • Aalon
  • Addison
  • AGA
  • Alicia Ellenwood
  • Anita
  • arlkhala
  • Arrhazon
  • Arrhazon College
  • Arrhka
  • Arrkarhara
  • Barbara Millwood
  • Bill Green
  • Boston
  • Brellian
  • Casey
  • Chsensera
  • city north
  • Cshrehyi
  • David
  • Djellrin
  • Dolores
  • Dottie Salston
  • Dr Elsrensia K’avahra
  • Dr. Ed Ellsworth
  • Dr. Wrehsx
  • E'sphara
  • Empo
  • Ensign Sserhara
  • Gl'nsiel
  • Henry Smithson
  • Hrilleae
  • I’Isahra M’lensa
  • J'saera
  • Jahrae
  • Jamila Karenga
  • J’luhre Forest Preserve
  • Jesnsera
  • Jredvarha City
  • Keene
  • Khaehala
  • Khahishra
  • Kukaeshra
  • Kyielra
  • Lajxa R’chr
  • llhaesa
  • Lzrehae
  • M'sela J'serhn
  • M'traliel
  • Marcia Paang
  • Mark Cahill
  • Mrevan
  • N'rellia
  • N'rellia Naturally
  • Nenseru Woods
  • Njesera
  • North 41
  • Old City
  • Olterian
  • reiki
  • Ronnie
  • Saehressa
  • Sara Beth
  • SEQ
  • Serada
  • Sjre Jlrasre
  • Sk'vra
  • southeast quadrant
  • Susan Woodward
  • Sylvia Washington
  • Tim
  • V'aesza
  • Vicki
  • Vreloran
  • Y'sre School of Music
  • Zreltian

♣ who’s who

Aalon:

Chief Curator of N’rellia Conservatory of Music



Aailhra:

Arrhazonan equivalent to Reiki



Addison:

Ronnie and llhaesa’s eldest daughter



Arrhazon:

llhaesa & Jahrae home world



Brellian:

Unstable Arrhazonan dictator



Chsensera:

Child friend of llhaesa and Jahrae



Cshrehyi T’yaeli:

llhaesa’s brother



Djellrin Khentavra:

Jahrae’s dad



E'sphara:

Owner of E’sphara Artist Colony



Gl’nsiel Frehsan:

Chief of Government after Brellian



Hrilleae Khentavra:

Jahrae’s mum



Admiral I'Isahra M'lensa:

Commander of Equality



Jahrae T'srha Khentavra:

llhaesa’s wife, and Ambassador



Jesnsera Sserhara:

hero of revolution who saves Jahrae



Ensign Jesnsera Sserhara:

daughter of Jahrae’s friend & wife of Chsensera



Elsrensia K’avahra:

Physician and revolutionary



Khaehala:

Chsensera’s mum



Khahishra:

llhaesa’s college roommate and M’traliel’s wife



Kyielra:

victim of murder, witnessed by young Jahrae



llhaesa ahrella t'yaeli:

musician and leader of two worlds



Lzrehae N’seseh:

Government employee and discoverer of important documents



M'sela J'serhn:

llhaesa’s college advisor



M'traliel Zralensa:

friend of llhaesa, and first lover



Mrevan:

llhaesa’s dad



Njesera:

Head of government records department



N'rellia:

Llhaesa’s college and most prestigious school on Arrhazon



Olterian:

Concert promoter



Saehressa:

llhaesa’s mum



Serada:

Ronnie and llhaesa’s youngest daughter



Sjre Jlrasre:

Café owner



Sk'vra Kjurha:

llhaesa nemesis and future hero of revolution



Vreloran:

government technician who helps llhaesa



Zreltian:

Former Arrhazonan Chief of Government



♣ historical tales

  • February 2009
  • January 2009
  • December 2008
  • November 2008
  • October 2008
  • September 2008
  • August 2008
  • July 2008
  • June 2008

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♣ CC License

Worlds Undone

by llhaesa t'yaeli



Is licensed under a

Creative Commons Attribution-No Derivative Works 3.0 United States License.

Based on a work at http://llhaesa.org/.

♣ CC Licence II

Worlds Undone

by llhaesa



Is licensed under a

Creative Commons Attribution-No Derivative Works 3.0 United States License.

Based on a work at llhaesa.wordpress.com.

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