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worlds undone

worlds undone

Tag Archives: transgender

CCXI – another bay, a different purpose

30 Sunday Nov 2008

Posted by nelle in Addison, Alicia Ellenwood, Anita, Barbara Millwood, Dolores, llhaesa, Ronnie, Serada

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While Barbara powered the Corsair 28 at exhilarating speed, Addison and Serada, replete in bright yellow life vests, soaked up the bright and warm late June sunshine. The temperature was an comfortable 85° Fahrenheit, perfect for time on the Bay.

The girls sat in the aft portion of the boat, laughing at how the wind blew and twist their hair in a generally backward direction, while watching the water’s surface barely ripple as the boat ride high and fast.

When not giggling, their facial expressions never dropped below that of a wide, toothy grin. While they looked around at various sites on the shores of the Bay, Ronnie made her way back to the girls, and sat down to render an update on where they headed.

“Addie, Serry… we are headed for a yacht that is in the middle of this Bay. Llhaesa is already on board the yacht, and we will stay there for a while, until things begin to sort out.” Ronnie had to yell for the girls to hear, for the combination of the roar of the close by motors and the wind created a loud cacophony of sound.

“Mom, when did llhaesa come out here?” Addie wondered, queried, and shouted.

“Apparently Barbara brought her out early this morning, Addie. She was rescued by Barbara.”

Addison and Serry both took note of the word ‘rescued,’ their expressions reflecting the registering of its meaning. Serry spoke next. “Why did Barbara have to rescue llhaesa?”

Ronnie did not wish to go into the details of what she knew; it would trigger undue worry, knowing she erred in using the word ‘rescued.’ “They made a mistake in where they placed llhaesa, and so they decided to move her out here on the water, where we can enjoy a nice vacation!”

Addison knew better, for she overheard some of the earlier conversation; she figured it was better to remain silent than trigger worry in her sister.

“How long will we stay on the boat?” Serry asked, evaluating what for her appeared to be an exciting vacation, one with where she would spend time with llhaesa.

“I am not sure, Serry,” Ronnie answered truthfully. I would guess we have to wait while they clear things up, and wait for President Ellenwood’s head to get better.”

Both girls loved President Ellenwood. She was from their state, a former governor, who proved incredibly popular throughout her governorship. Alicia Ellenwood formed strong ties to the young of the state and the country, for she was young and charismatic, with a great sense of humour. The President also held an uncanny ability to connect with virtually every child with whom she interacted. Small wonder both Addison and Serada thought highly of the President.

“What does the President have to do with us?” Serada reasonably asked, her mind assembling facts far too quickly.

“She is Barbara’s boss, Serry,” Ronnie hoped this would end this tangent. It did not.

“Why is Barbara with us?”

“She… um… it is her job to help us.”

“But why must she help us, mommy?”

“The President knows where llhaesa is from, Serry. She is the only one anyone on this world has ever met who comes from a place other than here. They wish to make certain she is safe.”

“There are people who come here from China, and the President does not have Barbara help them!” Serada added, quite astutely.

“Serry, people from China live on the same world as us!” Addie tossed out, in a way that older siblings tend to do when younger siblings persist in questions. “Llhaesa is an alien, and you know this. You… are the child of an alien. We are the only two children of an alien on the entire planet! That is why they protect us, because sometimes others do not like those who are different, they are afraid of them.”

“Are they afraid of me?”

“Of course they are, you meanie!” Addie taunted.

“I am not a meanie! Serry tossed back.

Ronnie moved to nip this sibling exchange before it grew into a spat. “OK, no one here is a meanie, Addison,” Ronnie began, giving a stern glare at her eldest daughter.” “And Serry, they are afraid of you only because you are llhaesa’s daughter, not because of anything you have done. Once they know you, they will not be afraid.”

Serry waited until she thought her mom’s head was turned, and then stuck her tongue out at Addie.

“You brat!” Addie called out.

“Addison!”

“Mom, she stuck her tongue out at me.”

“Serada, is that a nice thing to do to your sister?”

Serry looked sheepish, and her eyes lowered for a moment. “No, mommy, it was not nice for me to do.”

“Thank you.” Ronnie smiled at her youngest daughter, accepting the apology. “You girls are about to see llhaesa again, and you have not seen her in over three weeks. I would expect you would redirect your attention to this fact, and find those halos you are supposed to wear that you obviously misplaced.

I know it is hard to live life in the manner a halo signifies, but try and make the attempt, please.

Sensing a need to change the subject, Ronnie mentioned the Bay Dolphins, that they were playful, but that the dolphins must leave them alone. “When you girls see them, we do not feed these animals, because it hurts them by making them look to people for food instead of finding food the way they usually do.

When you are swimming, move slowly toward the boat, and climb out of the water.”

The girls pondered this, but had no questions, for Addison spotted a sizeable yacht ahead, and motioned toward the yacht.

Within moments, they were on the deck, greeted by llhaesa. Before llhaesa could hug Addie and Serry, their arms wrapped around her torso, though for Serry, her arms stretched upward to engage in a mid-section hug.

Llhaesa kissed Addison on her forehead, and talked of how much she missed her daughter. She then reached down, and easily pulled Serada off the deck up into her arms, where she then showered love upon her youngest daughter.

“It is so wonderful to be back with all of you!” llhaesa called out, casting a thankful look toward Barbara as she did so. “Barbara, I know you cannot stay, but I and my entire family are grateful for all you have done. Thank you.”

Barbara graciously and humbly answered, “You are most welcome!” and took her leave, headed for her office in the capitol.

Llhaesa greeted Anita and Dolores, and promised they would gather to talk later, “but for now, I would like to get reacquainted with Addison and Serada. Girls, would you like to go swimming?”

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♣ raison d’être


Over the past seven months, writing the individual stories of llhaesa and Jahrae, as well as their common story, has taken a special place in my heart.

There are some elements, those with playful exchanges, or those where discussion is heavier, that grab hold of my emotions, sometimes even grab hold of my thoughts, weighing upon me during the day.

llhaesa’s story has been welling inside of me for some significant time in rough form. The story is a by-product of coping with gender dysphoria, of being a feminist and a lesbian, and dealing with all the issues related to being lgbt through my life, from closet to post-coming out; while finding – or perhaps stumbling - my way through.

Music is the catalyst, a translator of raw sensory information and feelings, that helps me take the cloud forming in my mind and shape it into story. Sometimes this is via the lyrics, other times through the melody, sometimes simply by way of the sound of an individual instrument.

Musical influences come from Delerium; Beth Orton; Dar Williams; Joan Armatrading; Sarah McLachlan; Tori Amos; Natalie Merchant; Heather Nova; Tracy Chapman; Linda Perry; Alanis Morissette; Bruce Springsteen; Brooke White; Roxy Music; and many others.

There is no order to the posting of story elements or in writing them; each is posted randomly in time, of character, of place - much like how we might share stories from our lives with another. There are times when I will string together elements, and that pattern is evident in the rescue of llhaesa and the subsequent reunion.

Most of the novel is told via a narrator; with one exception. Writing llhaesa’s last day from her perspective - what she experiences, what she sees unfold around her, how she views and reacts to these things – seemed more compelling and interesting. I added one final element to this that actually is not of her last day on Arrhazon, but in her coming out here.

There are six posts told from llhaesa’s real time experience. These story elements (in her words I-VI) are the most interesting and fun to write, as well as the most emotionally draining. As I write this, 29 posts remain in book one, and the last ten have proven the most demanding emotionally.

Some of the story involves an element of science fiction, necessary to bridge the connection between the two worlds, the disconnects, the reconnects. It is not my intent to fashion a tale of science fiction, and the parts that touch on it will remain an essential minimum. The true intent is to share a humanist and feminist story, one where two worlds struggle to find their way to gender equality. The main protagonists are lesbian, and we get to see where at least on one world, this is no issue. Our world can have issue with us, and in this story, one gets to watch as both worlds find their way to creating more accepting and equal societies. The next book will find llhaesa facing this issue square on.

The story consists of 300 individual elements, which when collectively read forms a story of book length. As written currently and displayed on the blog, this is a rough draft; changes will likely be made over time to already published elements.

This is Book One, as what follows post 300 will best be framed into its own book. The second will address issues that will be at once interesting and challenging to explore and contemplate - building upon the story told in Book One. Llhaesa, drawing upon idealism, optimism, and an incredible ability to motivate, will tackle issues in ways I believe most all of us in the lesbian community would wish to see unfold in actuality. If nothing else, the story allows us to get lost in fantasy for a while.

While the title is ‘world’s undone,' this is really the life story of and the results triggered by an incredibly talented musician and activist. Llhaesa refuses to sit idly by while gender discrimination harms the women of her world and freedom is lost on one world, paying a terrible price for her effort. When she resurfaces here, now it is our turn to face her challenges to a world resulting from her unrelenting vision and dreams.

Jahrae, while prominent throughout the story, is sort of the unsung hero, the person who grows through the story to become a formidable presence in her own right. This is by design, and her growth is a perfect match to llhaesa, who needs someone to challenge and inspire her to new learning, to new creativity.

As I wrote the story, note that I originally did not plan on having the children parented by Jahrae, Ronnie, and llhaesa. Initially my intent was for friction to build, to show that sometimes we run into difficulty seeing eye to eye with our spouses. In the end, I could not do this, for my idealism and optimism, of trying to craft something as it should be, got in the way.

nelle

♣ say that again?

Aalon:

A.ah.lawn



Aailhra:

A.yul.har.rah



Arrhazon:

Are.ha zawn



Brellian:

Brr.L.lee.an



Chsensera:

Cheh.sen.sear.rah



Cshrehyi:

Sess.ray.hee



Djellrin:

Dee.jell.er.in



E'sphara:

E.ss.far.ruh



Gl’nsiel Frehsan:

Jellen.sheel Fray.shawn



Hrilleae:

Ha.rill.ee.ay



I'Isahra M'lensa:

I.ih.sah.rah Mah.len.sah



Jahrae T'srha Khentavra:

Ja.ha.ray Teh.share.ahh Ka.hen.tahv.rah



Jesnsera Sserhara:

Ja.ess.en.sear.ah Say.sear.ahh



Elsrensia K’avahra:

L.sir.rent.sha Kah.hah.vair.ah



Khaehala:

Kay.ha.la



Khahishra:

Ka.ha.heesh.ruh



Kyielra:

Ka.E.I'll.ra



llhaesa ahrella t'yaeli:

lie yay sah are.ha.rell.la tay.lye



Lzrehae N’seseh:

Lah.zer.ra.hay N.sha.say



M'sela J'serhn:

Mah.sell.ahh Jay.sehr.hen



M'traliel Zralensa:

M.tra.lee.ell Zee.ra.len.sah



Mrevan:

Mm.ruh.van



Njesera:

En.djuh.say.rah



N'rellia:

N.rell.lee.ah



Olterian:

Oh.L.tear.E.an



Saehressa:

Sigh.ah.ress.ah



Serada:

Sir.rah.da



Sjre Jlrasre:

S.jer.ray Jas.sell.rass.er



Sk'vra Kjurha:

Skeh.var.rah Kah.jour.rah



Vreloran:

Vreh.lore.an



Zreltian:

Zzer.L.she.an



♣ people and places

  • 51 Pegasi
  • Aailhra
  • Aalon
  • Addison
  • AGA
  • Alicia Ellenwood
  • Anita
  • arlkhala
  • Arrhazon
  • Arrhazon College
  • Arrhka
  • Arrkarhara
  • Barbara Millwood
  • Bill Green
  • Boston
  • Brellian
  • Casey
  • Chsensera
  • city north
  • Cshrehyi
  • David
  • Djellrin
  • Dolores
  • Dottie Salston
  • Dr Elsrensia K’avahra
  • Dr. Ed Ellsworth
  • Dr. Wrehsx
  • E'sphara
  • Empo
  • Ensign Sserhara
  • Gl'nsiel
  • Henry Smithson
  • Hrilleae
  • I’Isahra M’lensa
  • J'saera
  • Jahrae
  • Jamila Karenga
  • J’luhre Forest Preserve
  • Jesnsera
  • Jredvarha City
  • Keene
  • Khaehala
  • Khahishra
  • Kukaeshra
  • Kyielra
  • Lajxa R’chr
  • llhaesa
  • Lzrehae
  • M'sela J'serhn
  • M'traliel
  • Marcia Paang
  • Mark Cahill
  • Mrevan
  • N'rellia
  • N'rellia Naturally
  • Nenseru Woods
  • Njesera
  • North 41
  • Old City
  • Olterian
  • reiki
  • Ronnie
  • Saehressa
  • Sara Beth
  • SEQ
  • Serada
  • Sjre Jlrasre
  • Sk'vra
  • southeast quadrant
  • Susan Woodward
  • Sylvia Washington
  • Tim
  • V'aesza
  • Vicki
  • Vreloran
  • Y'sre School of Music
  • Zreltian

♣ who’s who

Aalon:

Chief Curator of N’rellia Conservatory of Music



Aailhra:

Arrhazonan equivalent to Reiki



Addison:

Ronnie and llhaesa’s eldest daughter



Arrhazon:

llhaesa & Jahrae home world



Brellian:

Unstable Arrhazonan dictator



Chsensera:

Child friend of llhaesa and Jahrae



Cshrehyi T’yaeli:

llhaesa’s brother



Djellrin Khentavra:

Jahrae’s dad



E'sphara:

Owner of E’sphara Artist Colony



Gl’nsiel Frehsan:

Chief of Government after Brellian



Hrilleae Khentavra:

Jahrae’s mum



Admiral I'Isahra M'lensa:

Commander of Equality



Jahrae T'srha Khentavra:

llhaesa’s wife, and Ambassador



Jesnsera Sserhara:

hero of revolution who saves Jahrae



Ensign Jesnsera Sserhara:

daughter of Jahrae’s friend & wife of Chsensera



Elsrensia K’avahra:

Physician and revolutionary



Khaehala:

Chsensera’s mum



Khahishra:

llhaesa’s college roommate and M’traliel’s wife



Kyielra:

victim of murder, witnessed by young Jahrae



llhaesa ahrella t'yaeli:

musician and leader of two worlds



Lzrehae N’seseh:

Government employee and discoverer of important documents



M'sela J'serhn:

llhaesa’s college advisor



M'traliel Zralensa:

friend of llhaesa, and first lover



Mrevan:

llhaesa’s dad



Njesera:

Head of government records department



N'rellia:

Llhaesa’s college and most prestigious school on Arrhazon



Olterian:

Concert promoter



Saehressa:

llhaesa’s mum



Serada:

Ronnie and llhaesa’s youngest daughter



Sjre Jlrasre:

Café owner



Sk'vra Kjurha:

llhaesa nemesis and future hero of revolution



Vreloran:

government technician who helps llhaesa



Zreltian:

Former Arrhazonan Chief of Government



♣ historical tales

  • February 2009
  • January 2009
  • December 2008
  • November 2008
  • October 2008
  • September 2008
  • August 2008
  • July 2008
  • June 2008

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♣ CC License

Worlds Undone

by llhaesa t'yaeli



Is licensed under a

Creative Commons Attribution-No Derivative Works 3.0 United States License.

Based on a work at http://llhaesa.org/.

♣ CC Licence II

Worlds Undone

by llhaesa



Is licensed under a

Creative Commons Attribution-No Derivative Works 3.0 United States License.

Based on a work at llhaesa.wordpress.com.

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